That Floating Excrement Was Way Too Meaningful! It's the TV Disappointments of the Past Year.

Looking back, we reflect on the television landscape of the past year, a selection of shows stand out not for their excellence, but for their notable shortcomings. Ranging from cringe-inducing sequels to confusingly bad documentaries, here are the productions that left us scratching our heads or simply reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

Where to begin with this love/hate follow-up? Burdened with dreadful scripts, painful arcs (we demand better for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the series struggled to justify its existence. Briefly, as the final season began, it seemed as if it had finally hit its stride. Then arrived an episode centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. Little surprise the showrunner declared this would be the final season. It ended on a bum note; the closeup of Miranda’s loo full of poo was simply too symbolic. Yet, viewers certainly found joy dissecting every single “what on earth?” episode. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – danced around her sprawling townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't let out a little sob?

The Kim Kardashian Drama

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? Of course she can’t.’

But that was practically the smallest of this drama's issues. The subject of a very rare zero star review, it was hard to know where to start listing the flaws. The laughably leaden dialogue? The mind-numbing glorification of wealth and materialism? The seemingly wilful procession of cliches? Performances so poor they felt almost spiteful? Let’s just say “each and every one” and forget about this series again. Except, a new season has been ordered, so we’re probably going to have to.

AKA Charlie Sheen

Considering the legal troubles, domestic violence allegations and parental shortcomings, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a troubled figure. Not you’d really have gleaned it from this multi-part documentary which smirked its way at Sheen’s various bouts of reckless excess while struggling to tell us anything we weren't already aware of. Instead, it felt as if this loose cannon was being pandered to, so any pity this series might induce should be reserved for the people who have had to endure close contact with this charming but dismissive narcissist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Naturally we knew it was preposterous from the get-go: a thriller about a supercomputer known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or annihilate all of humanity. We persevered out of sheer love for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One barely reacted when his character died, and the other ultimately slicing Charlie with an axe … in super slow-motion. That's what you call giving up the ghost.

The Gangster Drama

Dodgy figures meeting in empty boxing gyms? A certain band's Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and wants its crime drama back.

Actually, that is unfair on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many seem a little old-fashioned now, but at least they didn’t endure the ignominy of having to indulge unconvincing dialects. But there were many other problems. Mainly that it was just profoundly boring; a dispute over narcotics territory between various cockney picaresques which felt a bit basic.

The Meghan Markle Series

Considering the extent to which she grinds the gears of the nation’s ostentatiously angry commentators, it’s almost tempting to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s televised forays into twee homemaking as intentional provocations. But then you watch them and are forced to admit that actually, they may have a point. It’s like watching a homeware catalogue animated; a meme for wine o’clock with delusions of grandeur; a parade of sleeping dogs, buzzing beehives, Hallmark sayings and forgettable crafting “tips” you’ll not remember instantly. All underpinned by immense, mostly undeserved wealth. Ugh.

The Beckham Documentary

There are clearly interesting things to be said about regarding Victoria Beckham and her struggles with career, identity, self-worth. But for some reason, this three-part series chose not to say them. Rather, the viewing was akin to consuming a sales catalogue. She clearly has good reason to bridle at what she describes as her “stern” image. But sadly, she failed to do herself any helps with this guarded non-event of a series.

The Inheritance

It should have been the next cultural phenomenon – except even camper, with a glamorous star as a deceased benefactor and a sharp-tongued personality managing her inheritance. What more could you ask for? As contestants battled it out, there was plenty of betrayal and arguing. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s even now too complicated to explain what exactly was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw brief appearances of the star via filmed videos. The series ended up reeking of a production that was trying way too hard to emulate something far greater than it.

The Lena Dunham Romcom

How does one succeed a show that captured a generation? The expectation was immense for this glitzy romantic comedy about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who arrives in London with a shattered romance. The star seized the opportunity by the horns and was a delight to watch, reveling in Jane Austen levels of romantic ideals. But it was all very glossy and, paradoxically, was not enough. Plus, the sheer amount of celebrity cameos involved felt icky.

Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping

Not even good enough to be ‘patchy’.

Given the smart inclusion of gifted younger comics, hopes were high. But sadly, most of it fell flat. A recurring sketch was a one-note joke stretched to a husk but recurring in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a well-known irate mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, in contrast, simply inspired the thought that they should probably have stayed in there a bit longer.

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox

This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much solely showcased the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there undoubtedly is an compelling drama to be made about the tragic 2007 murder, this was not it. The subject matter needed to be handled sensitively. Rather, the series laboured awkwardly to find the right tone, lurching from strangely jaunty, somewhat mannered farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Twisted? Arguably. A complete mess? Very much so.

Prime Target

We admire the lead actor … but did we buy him playing the most brilliant maths genius in history, a man so smart he’s on the verge of a breakthrough that could ruin society? Nope! This globe-trotting thriller about government agencies spying on – and eliminating – intellectuals honestly got more absurd by the second. Silliness-by-numbers.

1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story

This hagiography followed the content creator renowned for sexual exploits as she prepared for her biggest feat yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we craved was way more examination of her actual psychology, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have interviewed the now-famous mum who showed up to drag her son away from the queue. What we got was horrific shots and zero interrogation of her notoriety whatsoever. It's staggering to consider, the documentary-maker has a teenage daughter too.